Crossword puzzles leave me clueless and frustrated

I like words. I've spent most of my adult life as a writer of one sort or another (mostly "another") and often make fun of famous people who misuse words. I'm a snob in that way, although mostly secretly (because I know that publicly making fun of someone's grammar or word use guarantees that I will make a mistake).

I should be a fan of crossword puzzles.

I'm not.

They make me mad, in the same way a 5-year-old gets mad: "It's not fair. It's stupid. They're cheating!"

Shortly before the pandemic began, Mrs. Brad and I made a change in our nightly ritual. Instead of watching TV, we'd do something else at about 9 p.m. We'd go into our office (really, the second bedroom at our swank residential compound) and she'd do a hobby (paint, build tiny rooms) and I would either write or try puzzles.

Emphasis on try.

I'm not a puzzle fan, but I figured I could become one. How hard can puzzles be? I read "Highlights" as a child in doctors' waiting rooms. I can spot the differences in two drawings, I can solve a maze that's designed for 6-year-olds, so I should be able to do Sudoku and crosswords.

Turns out Sudoku isn't that hard. The more difficult puzzles are very hard, but the easy and medium-difficulty ones? I can at least attempt them. Sudoku is an elimination puzzle. You can usually figure things out if you just keep trying and eliminating possibilities.

It turns out crossword puzzles are just as hard as I remembered them being. Because of the blasted puzzle makers.

People who put together crossword puzzles have two major problems:

• They give clues that have multiple answers.
• They give clues that no normal person could solve.

I can figure out most clues that don't fall into those categories. But invariably, I run into the second or third clue in a crossword puzzle and it's something like this: "A five-letter word for fast."

What the heck? A five-letter word for "fast?" Maybe swift? Quick? Rapid? Speed? Fasty?

Those types of clues just make me mad. I'm allowed to be sloppy – I commonly make grammar errors and misspell words and expect grace from readers. But the people who put together crossword puzzles and school tests should be exact, right?

Right?

Anyway, those are the clues that have too many answers. The other frequent irritating crossword puzzle clue is the clue that no normal person could solve.

Invariably, a crossword puzzle will have a clue like, "The mythical river credited with the founding of Glasgow." "Or, "Tippi Hedren's beau in 'The Harrad Experiment.'" Or, "Third-most-popular character in written Mandarin."

I could see how someone could know one of those things. Maybe a Scottish historian or movie buff or Chinese language expert. But who knows all of them? Who knows two of them?

When these clues invariably occur, I just get mad. "Who does these puzzles?" I ask Mrs. Brad, who looks up from her painting with a patient smile. "Some sort of wizard?"

By then, I'm just mad.

Of course, there is the occasional payoff if I stick with it and keep trying the puzzles. Eventually, there's a clue I know. Sometimes, it's not even easy.

Maybe it's: Warriors last All-Star before David Lee (Sprewell) or Philly Group that Sang "Love Train" (OJays).

Or maybe it's this: Better puzzle than crossword (Sudoku or Highlights maze).

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@outlook.com.

Facebook data reveals users' preferences, company's agenda

Take a guess at the most-viewed link shared on Facebook during the second quarter of 2021 (April through June).

Nope. Wrong. Guess again.

Nope. Still wrong.

In a world of COVID conspiracy theories, vaccine arguments, political hostility and Tik-Tok videos, the most-viewed link on Facebook during those three months was a website that allows Green Bay Packers fans to pay for interaction with former Packers.

That's true. At least according to a report released by Facebook in August.

I guess it makes sense. Who wouldn't want to go miniature golfing with Ahman Green and Al Harris? Or mountain biking with Brett Favre and the late Vince Lombardi ("Cycling isn't everything. It's the only thing")?

The Facebook report purported to provide insight into what gets the most attention on social media.

One of Facebook's big takeaways was that no single item gets tremendous attention. The top 20 links combined made up less than one-tenth of 1% of all page views on Facebook during that period.

The rest of the top five provides a view of how weirdly diverse our tastes are: Second was a hemp website, third was the site to give to UNICEF to help fight COVID in India, fourth was a food blogger website called My Incredible Recipes and fifth was a Christian apparel website.

Those are links. The most-seen post was the one with a bunch of letters on the screen with an explanation that the first three words you see "are your reality" (yours would be: Reading Dumb Column). Other most-seen posts include one telling you to post a photo that makes you look young, one with questions about what you would never eat and one asking whether sugar goes on spaghetti. Important stuff. If you spend much time on Facebook, you've probably seen many of the most-viewed posts.

Facebook emphasized the same thing with the most-seen posts: That the top 20 combined to make up less than one-tenth of 1% of page views. The implication (that they want us to draw) is that most of us spend most of our social media time seeing friends' posts and photos.

That's kind of true. But also very, very untrue, because of what Facebook didn't do: Report how often people posted similar information. Often misleading information. Sometimes harmful information.

Curiously, about a week after releasing the report for the second quarter, Facebook finally released a report for the first quarter of 2020 – a report it earlier shelved for reasons that were apparent: The most-viewed link from the first quarter was about a doctor who died after a COVID vaccine (later reports showed the vaccine wasn't connected to his death. Alas, the later reports didn't get seen). That single post played a major role in spreading misinformation about the COVID vaccine. Again, not seen by most people, but still significant. It was better for Facebook to highlight the Packers' website, right?

Most importantly, Facebook didn't report what similar information was shared. Just on the specific links and posts. In that way, the reports are kind of useless.

Social media is an echo chamber, where people hear things and share them without checking. Pretty soon, something is so widely viewed that it doesn't matter that it's false. People believe it.

I don't know the solution to that problem and I don't know the specifics of how Facebook could gather information on information that is shared. But the fact that Facebook tailors advertising specifically to your posts indicates the company is capable of doing better.

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@outlook.com.

Workweek survey shows youngest workers are insane

There's only one reasonable interpretation of a recent survey of the type of workweek Americans desire: Millennials and members of Generation Z are foolish.

If not the only conclusion, it's at least that's the most obvious conclusion from a recent survey by data intelligence company Morning Consult, which found that 10% of each of those generations would prefer to work five hours per day, seven days a week.

Five hours per day, every day. That's right, they apparently don't want any days off if it means they can work less than six hours per day.

Madness!

Also, it's likely the opinion of people who have never had to work seven or 10 or 15 consecutive days, due to short staffing or multiple co-workers being on vacation.

Before we go further, consider what you would prefer: Given the choice of three 13-plus-hour days, four 10-hour days, five eight-hour days, six six-plus-hour days or seven five-plus-hour days, which would you pick?

Jam all your work shifts together? Spread them out over seven days? Stay with the five-day workweek and traditional two-day weekend?

Here's what the survey indicated: A plurality of people prefers a four-day, 10-hour workweek. That opinion is far from universal, as some demographics prefer the five-day, eight-hour workday (men, millennials and urbanites all rank that option first), but it's fairly popular. Among more than 1,000 working adults surveyed, 40% prefer a four-day workweek and 35% would choose a five-day week.

However, consider the big picture: Nearly two-thirds of those surveyed would prefer something other than the traditional workweek (although four 10-hour shifts it the most popular alternative). Unsurprisingly, the generation with the least amount of variety is baby boomers: 89% of us would take either a four- or five-day workweek.

It's the outliers who are most interesting: The people who would prefer to work three 13.3-hour days a week or seven, 5.7-hour days a week.

The amount of interest in the three-day, 13.3-hour workweek (other than from baby boomers) is fairly steady across generations, geographies and genders at between 5% and 10%. I can understand those people, who consider the value of a four-day weekend. I suspect many of them have never had to work back-to-back shifts of 12 hours or more, so the idea seems pleasant. The reality isn't pleasant: If you have to work that schedule it feels like all you do is work and sleep.

However, that option makes more sense than those we discussed at the start: People who would prefer to work every day (Every. Single. Day. That means Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday . . . ). Supporters of that schedule include 12% of urban dwellers and 9% of rural residents. I can understand the latter if they're farmers. Seven days of only 5.7 hours would be a break, right?

But the fact that one of 10 millennials and Gen Z members would choose to work every single day (again, that's Sunday, Monday, Tuesday . . .) indicates one of two things: Either they haven't considered what it would be like to never have a day off or they plan to call in sick twice a week.

I guess the problem would be to decide when to call in sick? I suggest Saturday and Sunday. You know, the weekend.

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@outlook.com.

NFL's return this week highlights sport's power in America

America's undisputed most popular TV show is back this week. So is America's most popular sport.

They are the same thing: The NFL.

Just a few years after we learned conclusively that many former players suffered brain injuries due to the sport, the NFL has a stronger hold than ever on American sports fans and it's not even close.

When asked in a recent survey, 37% of Americans said football was their favorite sport, more than double baseball, which was second.

TV ratings show an even more dramatic edge. When it comes to getting viewers, the NFL dominates other sports in America like the Bears dominated the then-Redskins in the 1940 NFL championship game: Chicago 73, Washington 0 (hey! NFL trivia!).

To wit:

Among the 25 most-watched TV shows so far this year, 15 are NFL games (Key point: only the final week of the 2020 season and 13 playoff games were played in 2021).  In fact, 14 of the 15 most-watched shows were NFL games (the exception: President Biden's inauguration, which came in sixth, just ahead of an AFC wild-card playoff game).

The Super Bowl dominates TV viewership in 2021, just like every year. But every NFL playoff game made the top 25 most-watched shows. Heck, two regular-season games made the list (and more would have, except as mentioned, there was only the one week of the regular season in 2021).

Further proof of how football dominates TV ratings: In addition to the 15 NFL games, the top-25 list of shows for 2021 also includes three college football games.

If you asked me in 2015 or 2016, I would have said that interest in football in 2021 would be on the decline. The increased spotlight on brain trauma suffered by former NFL, college and high school players was obvious. Parents would pull their sons from football in favor of other sports. The energy of most NFL broadcasts (Brash! Dangerous! Spectacular!) would wear thin.

Basketball was coming fast. It was a social media sport – NBA stars are active on Twitter and Instagram, league rumors churn year-round, it's a great TV sport. Soccer was on the way, with European leagues attracting much of the NFL's core audience of young males. Mixed martial arts was growing rapidly, with pay-per-view events airing constantly. Maybe even baseball would come back.

A few years later, the NFL is bigger, badder and more powerful than ever. The next group of TV contracts will set new records – and based on ratings, they should.

It all comes back this week as the Cowboys (America's Team) and the Buccaneers (Super Bowl champions) kick off the season Thursday. The 49ers and Raiders both play Sunday. Tens of millions (hundreds of millions?) of viewers will be glued to their screens, watching the games, tracking their fantasy leagues, enjoying what the league offers..

There's the possibility that, like me, you're not a huge NFL fan. But like many things over the past several years, get used to it.

The NFL is a dominant feature of American life and is gaining steam.

The NFL is king of American sports and culture.

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@outlook.com.