Reasons to look ahead to 2024

It's the final day of an eventful year – but we're on the brink of what might be worse.

If I ask you to name the biggest events of 2023, you might struggle, so here are a few you may have forgotten: Titan submersible implodes, killing five people;  school shooting; Trump indictment;  attack on Israel by Hamas and subsequent war; Russian attack on Ukraine continues; school shooting; Trump indictment; Barbie vs. Oppenheimer in summer movies; Kevin McCarthy ousted as House Speaker and chaos ensues; Maui wildfires; school shooting; Trump indictment; Dodgers collapse again in playoffs.

With many people expecting some terrible drama to unfold over the next 12 months – highlighted by what threatens to be the ugliest presidential election in American history – let's take a deep breath and consider some other things that will happen in 2024. 

Things that don't make you dislike your family members or neighbors. Things that don't make you angry or afraid whenever you think of them.

Remember these things as you are bombarded by frightening images and news over the next 12 months. It's not all bad.

1. There are people in your life whom you love and who love you. Even if it feels like everything is coming apart on a big scale, remember that there are people who are concerned about you and vice-versa. Everybody isn't fighting everyone else.

2. Technology causes concerns, but remember that you now have the world at your fingertips. We have more entertainment options than at any time in human history and we regularly participate in the miraculous (Mobile phones! Airplane travel! Microwaved food! GPS mapping!). Try to celebrate the amazing things you can do at least as much as you lament the problems of technology.

3. What do you call a one-legged hippo? A hoppo. See, even in the middle of a newspaper column, you can find pleasure (or anger. Let's say "you can find strong emotion.")

4. The Dodgers may have three of the five best hitters in baseball and an All-Star pitching staff, but they'll still probably lose in the playoffs. That feeling? Germans call it schadenfreude, which means "A Dodgers loss."

5. It's an election year, but it's also a Summer Olympics year. That means this summer's Paris Olympics (late July through mid-August) will give you another chance to care about beach volleyball, taekwondo, artistic swimming, weightlifting and more for the last time until 2028 (when the Olympics are in Los Angeles!). You will also get the opportunity to be proud of our country because we create great track and gymnastics performers.

6. You will do plenty of good things. A fact of life: When evaluating things, we look forward much more than we look back, which means we're much more aware of what we need to do than what we've done. That gets things done, but here's a suggestion for 2024: If you routinely make "to-do" lists, consider making a "done" list so you can reflect on what you've accomplished. In the next 12 months, you will undoubtedly do some major things and likely forget them.

7. You survived the COVID-19 pandemic. Medical people are reluctant to call the pandemic over, but let's face it: COVID killed 350,000 Americans in 2020, 460,000 in 2021 and fewer than 70,000 in 2023, likely dropping it out of the top 10 causes of death. You survived a pandemic that people will discuss for the rest of your life. If you were told in mid-2020 that you'd be fine in 2024, you would have taken it.

8. When you get stressed, see No. 1.

Reach Brad Stanhope at brad.stanhope@outlook.com.

It's beginning to look a lot like . . . my annual Solano quiz

"It's a Wonderful Life" on TV, the burning of the yule log, college football bowl games sponsored by companies you've never heard of, crowded shopping malls and shockingly early sunsets. All December traditions.

It's time for another, my annual Solano County quiz. I started this December tradition in the late 19th century, when Hezekiah McNaughton first launched the Daily Republic as The Weekly Wind-Blown Emporium and Newsatorium. It has appeared uninterrupted for the past 137 years.

The rules are simple. See how many of the following 20 questions about Solano County can you answer correctly. Googling is discouraged and educated guesses are encouraged. Correct answers are provided at the end.

If you live in the county, you should be able to get some of these right. Get your pen or pencil . . . I'll wait.

Ready? Go!

1. Name the seven incorporated Solano County cities.

2. Within five years, when was Fairfield incorporated as a city?

3. What was Solano County's largest cash crop in 2022?

4. Name the four Interstate freeways in Solano County.

5. Name the five state highways in Solano County.

6. Where have all the flowers gone?

7. Name the five counties that are adjacent to Solano County.

8. Within 100,000, what was Solano County's population in 2020?

9. What was the last presidential election in which Solano County voted Republican?

10. What month has the average highest daily temperature in Fairfield?

11. Within 200 miles, how long a drive is it from Fairfield to Fairfield, Connecticut?

12. How many public schools are in Suisun City?

13. Name at least two of the three members of the House of Representatives who represent parts of Solano County.

14. Of the two major prisons in Vacaville (California Medical Facility and California State Prison Solano), which had more inmates as of Dec. 1?

15. Based on the Census Bureau's 2022 estimates, is Fairfield among the 300 most populated cities in the United States?

16. In 2022, what Solano County did financial news and opinion company 24/7 Wall St. determine to be the "most diverse small town in America?"

17. In what cities are the two general aviation airports in Solano County?

18. Within 1,000, how many students attend Solano Community College?

19.  In what year did Brig. Gen. Robert Travis die in a plane crash at what was then called the Fairfield-Suisun Air Force Base?

20. What is five times five?

ANSWERS

1. Benicia, Dixon, Fairfield, Rio Vista, Suisun City, Vacaville, Vallejo.

2. 1903.

3. Tomatoes (for the first time in seven years).

4. 80, 505, 680, 780.

5. 12, 29, 37, 84, 113.

6. Young girls have picked them, every one. When will they ever learn?

7. Contra Costa, Napa, Sacramento, Sonoma, Yolo.

8. 453,491.

9. 1984, when Ronald Reagan got 54.5% of the vote.

10. July, at 89.6 degrees (August is 89.2 degrees).

11. 2,916 miles.

12. Four (Suisun Elementary, Crescent Elementary, Dan O. Root Elementary, Crystal Middle).

13. Mike Thompson, John Garamendi and Doris Matsui (who represents a tiny slice of Solano).

14. California State Prison Solano had 2,594 inmates as of Dec. 1, 276 more than CMF.

15. Yes. It ranks 245th in the nation.

16. Vallejo, with a 77% chance that any two residents would be of a different census racial category.

17. Rio Vista and Vacaville.

18. 9,500.

19. 1950. The base was renamed for Travis a year later.

20. 25, in case you need a right answer to feel good enough to retake this quiz next year.

SCORING

15-20 correct: Brilliant.

10-14: Pretty smart.

5-9: Smart.

0-4: Resilient.

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@outlook.com.

2023 was a year of miraculous changes in NBA, MLB

When sports historians look back on 2023, they'll consider it the year of miracles – not because of an incredible feat or unbelievable comeback.

But because the people who run to major American sports made brilliant decisions. That was previously unthinkable – especially when you consider one of the sports is baseball, which has a long history of short-sighted and or much-delayed decisions.

In 2023, the leadership of Major League Baseball and the NBA each made wildly successful changes, despite plenty of doubt about both moves before their respective seasons. In an era when it seemed like only the NFL could make good decisions (if you define "good decision" as "something that makes more people watch, thus making more money for the owners"), baseball and the NBA were brilliant.

Start with baseball, which instituted a series of rule changes to increase the game's pace and add action. Traditionalists were convinced that adding a pitch clock and outlawing the shift (where three infielders play on one side of the infield because data shows a hitter on the other team almost exclusively hits the ball that way) would be the end of the world. Because when Babe Ruth, Ted Williams and Willie Mays played, those weren't the rules.

However, those changes and others (larger bases and a limit on pickoff throws by a pitcher to encourage base stealing), brought spectacular results. The games were faster and had more action.

The average game time in 2023 dropped by 24 minutes, from three hours, and four minutes to two hours and 40 minutes. Baseball in 2023 had the shortest average game time since 1985. Baseball also had more action, with more hits, more stolen bases and more runs. Meanwhile, attendance increased by nearly 10%, surpassing 70 million fans.

Shorter games, more action, more fans. 

These changes were made by owners who traditionally wait until something is a problem for a decade before they form a committee to look into appointing a blue-ribbon panel to study whether they should consider evaluating the situation.

Baseball got it right. And baseball kept the rules in place for the postseason, again getting it right.

Who knew Major League Baseball could make a collective good decision?

Meanwhile, the NBA – pushed by Commissioner Adam Silver – adopted an in-season tournament to build fan interest early in the season. Most observers mocked it, suggesting players wouldn't care and that fans would spend more time ridiculing it than following it.

Wrong and wrong.

The tournament – which ended last weekend when the Lakers beat the Pacers in Las Vegas – featured crazily-decorated courts, players who really wanted to win and fans treating it like a big deal (particularly teams like Indiana, which hasn't seen much success in recent years). The championship game felt like it meant something, with players absolutely locked in and the Lakers genuinely celebrating their championship.

The result? While the NBA remains far, far, far behind the NFL in attention from most fans, the sport garnered some attention ahead of the traditional Christmas games that generally serve to remind fans that the sport exists (despite the season being about one-third over by then).

There's plenty that went wrong in sports this year: Professional golf remains a mess, realignment of major conferences revealed the incredibly greedy underbelly of collegiate sports, the Dodgers got the best free agent in a generation and more.

But the leadership of Major League Baseball and the NBA made changes that had many people dubious. And those changes succeeded wildly.

Let's enjoy it while we can because history suggests this surely won't last.

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@outlook.com.

Got a ricer in your kitchen? You're younger or a great cook

Do you have chopsticks in your kitchen? Do you use a mandolin (apparently not just a musical instrument!) as a utensil?

You probably watched "The Simpsons" growing up – perhaps in reruns. You're younger.

Do you have a ladle in your kitchen?

You probably watched O.J. Simpson while growing up. As an NFL star, not a defendant.

Your kitchen utensils reveal how old you are. Or vice-versa.

First, some definitions: "Young," means 44 or younger. "Older" means 45 or older. Those aren't my definitions, they're from the folks at  Yougov.com, whose job description should include, "providing data to help Brad with column ideas." Yougov.com recently surveyed 1,000 American adults about one of the pressing issues of the day: What utensils are in your kitchen?

First, the commonalities. Almost all of us – regardless of age and cooking ability – have some kitchen utensils in common: Measuring cups, can openers, spatulas and measuring spoons are owned by more than 90% of us. More than 85% of us own steak knives, colanders, cutting boards and tongs.

When it comes to kitchen utensils, those are the basics.

Deeper down the list it gets more dicey. The following items are owned by less than three-quarters of us: food thermometer, potato masher, rolling pin, ice cream scooper.
Don't feel bad if you don't have an ice cream scooper. About one-third of your neighbors don't, either.
The intriguing part to me was the list of items that tended to be owned only by people who consider themselves expert chefs or only by people 44 and younger since I'm neither (and Mrs. Brad is only one of them).
Among those items far more likely to be owned by people who consider themselves "great cooks" are such things as zesters, garlic presses, the aforementioned mandolin and ricers.
Apparently, a ricer is something that processes food by making it go through small holes the size of rice. Who knew?
The list of items more likely to be owned by people 44 and younger is remarkably similar to those who think they're great cooks, which suggests that most people who think they are great cooks are young. Apparently, those young great cooks don't realize that you shouldn't name a kitchen utensil a "mandolin" when there's already a great musical instrument with that name. It's like naming a type of food a drumstick when there's . . . never mind. It's like calling musical instruments spoons when there's . . . never mind.

I guess when it comes down to it, we have in our kitchen what we need. And over time, those things change.
When was the last time you saw someone with a breadbox? When did you last use a hand mixer? Heck, when did you last use a Pyrex container to keep leftovers?
Maybe someday, people will look back on the 2020s as the golden age of the ricer or talk about when grandma used a mandolin.
If people remember that, it won't change the fact that "ricer" is a weird name for a utensil, but what do I know? I'm old and not a great cook.

The proof? I don't have a ricer.

Reach Brad Stanhope at brad.stanhope@outlook.com.

'Asbestos of the 1990s': Whatever happened to carpal tunnel syndrome?

Sometime in the 1990s, I needed a wrist brace.

I was the Daily Republic's sports editor, which meant I spent five days a week typing and using a  mouse. My wrist and forearms began to ache.

It was concerning, but no surprise. Probably half the people in the newsroom faced a similar scenario. We were in the middle of the carpal tunnel syndrome epidemic.

It wasn't limited to newspapers. Virtually everyone who worked at a keyboard or who did anything that required repetitive motion with their wrists and hands was at risk. Stores had loads of wrist guards. People had surgery for the malady.

A decade later, in 2008, a newspaper article looking back at the era quoted an ergonomist named Bill Barbre: “Carpal tunnel syndrome was supposed to be the asbestos of the ’90s,” he said. “People were hearing that, potentially, just normal computer work was an insidious health hazard.”

It sure seemed like it. But it was also an opportunity for a showoff sports writer: I would often signal that I was taking a break (or going downstairs to check on how the sports pages were being put together) by standing, ripping off my wrist guard like Barry Bonds and firing it down on my desk.

It amused me. No one else noticed it, but I kept doing it.

Decades later, carpal tunnel syndrome is still a thing. The website of the American Academy of Orthopaedic Surgeons describes it thusly: "Carpal tunnel syndrome is a common condition that causes numbness, tingling, and pain in the hand and forearm. The condition occurs when one of the major nerves to the hand – the median nerve – is squeezed or compressed as it travels through the wrist."

But still . . .  how often do you hear about carpal tunnel syndrome? In 2023, people wear wrist guards, but it's usually for something else. I haven't heard anyone mention "carpal tunnel syndrome" for ages.

What happened?

Well, it's not entirely clear.

I did some research (by typing "whatever happened to carpal tunnel syndrome?" into Google) and found a series of articles over the past 20 years with a headline of "Whatever happened to carpal tunnel syndrome?" Most of them were musings on how the syndrome seemed to go away. By the middle of the first decade of the 2000s, carpal tunnel syndrome was a subject of nostalgia, not a crisis.

My favorite headline, by the way, is from 2008 on MSNBC's website: "Carpal tunnel replaced by BlackBerry thumb as new malady." Yeah, people were getting sore thumbs. From using their BlackBerry devices.

Carpal tunnel syndrome didn't disappear, but it became less prominent. The biggest reason may be the 1990s "epidemic."

In that era, keyboards came in one style. Many office chairs were from before the computer age. Almost no one talked about sitting correctly or how to position your body while doing repetitive motions. I'd never heard the word ergonomic.

In the past several decades, there's been a slow creep of better workplace ergonomics: Better keyboards, better chairs, instruction on how to sit and how often to take breaks.

Carpal tunnel syndrome may be less prominent for office workers in 2023 because it was so common in the 1990s.

Businesses had to make an investment to protect their workers. Maybe they wanted to help. Maybe it was costing too much in workers' comp claims. Maybe it was because businesses didn't want to hear employees complain.

I sometimes miss firing down my wrist guard like Barry Bonds, but I sure don't miss sore wrists.

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@outlook.com.

NHL's emergency backup goalie plan should be in every sport

Hockey has the greatest rule in sports: The emergency backup goalie, or EBUG.

It's a simple idea: Professional hockey teams generally carry two goalies on their roster, since goalies rarely get hurt or ejected from games and both goalies on a team almost never do.

But if something weird happens? If both goalies for a team get hurt?

The EBUG enters the game.

And here's the great part: The EBUG is a regular person – a local hockey player, a member of the coaching staff or maybe a relative of a team employee who needed free tickets. Each NHL team must provide an EBUG for every game and those players are available in case either team loses both goalies. The EBUG is the "break-glass-in-case-of-emergency" player.

In that case? The EBUG enters the game. And plays. They are the goalie in an NHL game!

It's only happened six times in the history of the NHL, most recently by the Anaheim Ducks in the final game of the 2021-2022 season.

But the idea? It's fantastic! It's like getting called out of the stands at a baseball game to play right field or being called from the stands at an NBA game to defend LeBron James for a few possessions.

Heck, it could even mean being called out of the gallery to carry someone's golf clubs or called out of the stands at a tennis match to chase down balls.

Can you imagine going to a 49ers game and after their kicker and punter are hurt, the team calls you out of the stands to handle both chores? Could you do it? Even if you've practiced?

The idea that regular people can suddenly find themselves in the action is found mostly in Disney movies or in weird dream sequences on sitcoms. But in hockey, it's possible.

For instance, that season-ending Ducks game in 2022 saw a guy named Tom Hodges play the third period in goal after Anaheim's top two goalies were hurt. The game was in Dallas, so no one on the Ducks had met Hodges, who in his regular life is an insurance salesman. While playing, he wore a mishmash of team equipment – a mask and pads from the Dallas Stars, a jersey of the Ducks. He'd played college hockey and briefly was a minor-league hockey player, but mostly he's an EBUG, attending Stars games, just in case.

Just in case happened.

I don't know how you'd add this option to other sports, but I endorse this.

We already love lesser versions: When a non-catcher has to play catcher in baseball or a pitcher has to play the outfield. When a kicker or punter gets hurt in football and someone unfamiliar with the role has to take over. When all the tall players foul out and an NBA team has to play a lineup with no one taller than 6-foot-4.

We'd love it even more if there were a version of the EBUG in those sports.

My proposal: All sports create a version of the EBUG, but rather than it being a designated person, make it a blind draw: Just before the game starts, the PA announcer lets the crowd know that the person sitting in Section 49, Row L, Seat 8 is the emergency player for the game.

That person is given a uniform and told to be ready, just in case.

It would make every game more exciting. It would make every ticket a lottery. And if it happened once every three or four years, it would be spectacular.

Let's adopt the NHL rule and add an Emergency Backup Player (EBUP) to every sport!

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@outlook.com.

The long national wait is over; Nerf is in the toy hall of fame

The Toy Hall of Fame in Rochester, New York, will finally induct my childhood this year.

Along with the Fisher-Price corn popper and Cabbage Patch Kids, that is.

Nerf balls and baseball cards – the most influential "toys" of my youth – were finally inducted to the toy shrine at the Strong National Museum of Play earlier this month after years of being passed over. The honor for Nerf balls came after me campaigning for them year after year after year.

It's about time.

Suitable for a toy that has been overlooked year after year, Nerf was overshadowed in the announcement. This time it wasn't because Nerf was outvoted by the rocking horse or the stick or Jenga. This time it was because Ken was bypassed by voters despite being the sneaky star of the year's biggest movie.

Ken can wait. He's used to being in the shadows (and did anyone ever get excited about a Ken doll? When it comes to toys, he's an accessory!). This is Nerf's year. And it's the year of baseball cards.

Anyone of my generation can (and should) join me in celebrating the indication of Nerf into the toy shrine, with the honor coming a full six years after its harder-shell cousin, the Wiffle Ball, was inducted. Want even more stunning news? The following toys were inducted into the Toy Hall of Fame ahead of the Nerf ball: jigsaw puzzles, the Game Boy, rubber ducks and Risk.

Over Nerf balls!

Nerf revolutionized how we play. The spongy ball (my first Nerf ball was just that. There was no Nerf basketball or Nerf football or Nerf gun. There was just a Nerf ball that I could throw at my sisters and see them flinch) changed indoor action.

I could bounce it off the wall and not have a parent yell at me. I could shoot it at the laundry basket, anticipating the creation of the Nerf basketball. Had none of the subsequent Nerf toys emerged, the Nerf ball still would be legendary and worthy of induction into the Hall of Fame.

Alas, it spawned an entire world of Nerf products.

It's a similar story for baseball cards. I've written about my baseball cards in the past, but their arrival was a harbinger of childhood spring and summer for me. Over the years – notably when I was in middle school – I collected and collected and collected. I had multiple years of complete sets of 660 (then 726) cards made by Topps. The fact that I know far more about mid-1970s baseball players than those on current rosters has something to do with age and memory, but it also has to do with those cardboard pictures with stats on the back.

(By the way, I sold my card collection a few years ago to a friend who helped get me started. Of course, I sold them shortly before a worldwide pandemic reinvigorated the card-collecting craze and doubled, tripled and quadrupled prices. Which is why I'm glad I sold them to a friend, not a business.)

The corn popper (that toy toddlers push around as they learn to walk) and Cabbage Patch Kids are also worthy honorees to the Toy Hall of Fame. But when historians look back on this class of the Toy Hall of Fame, they'll nod in agreement with the selection of baseball cards and shake their heads in alarm that it took this long – as part of the 26th class to be inducted – before Nerf made it into the Hall of Fame.

I'll now end my boycott of the Hall of Fame. If I somehow find myself in Rochester, New York, with a chance to visit, I'll go.

And I'll grab the Nerf and throw it at someone, seeing if they flinch like my sisters did.

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@outlook.com.

Writing up the unwritten rules for passengers on planes

Legendary essayist Ralph Waldo Emerson put it succinctly: "Good manners are made up of petty sacrifices." 

Emerson wasn't talking about unwritten rules on airplanes (since he died 21 years before the Wright Brothers took flight in Kitty Hawk, North Carolina), but he could have been. Manners are important when you're stuck in a metal tube thousands of feet in the air with hundreds of people for several hours. Some basic politeness – following societal rules – can make it better for everyone.

But what are the rules? We know we can't bring our weapons or a 3.5-ounce drink through security, but what about other passenger rules?

You probably have opinions, but the folks at Kayak (the travel website) made it official when they surveyed people on the internet (not science, but still a survey) to gain an understanding of general "rules."

Here's what the public says about some airplane "rules," with the correct answer from someone who routinely sits in the middle seat so Mrs. Brad can have the window and who often falls asleep and misses the opportunity to get "free" peanuts or soda.

• Can you take off your shoes in flight? Most people (56%) say no because it's gross. Brad says: Go ahead, as long as your feet don't stink. I keep my shoes on, but that's because I'm not an animal.
• Do you get to control the shade if you have the window seat? The public says yes (77%). Brad also says yes for the same reason you get to control your window in the car: You're sitting next to it. If you want to control the window shade, get a window seat. Also, Mrs. Brad sits by the window and I trust her.
• Can you rush to get off the plane ahead of others? Most people (58%) say no because it's unfair. The public says you should wait your turn. Brad says: Of course not. This is like thinking you shouldn't have to wait in line at the grocery store. If you're over 5, you can wait. The exception is if you have explosive diarrhea, of course (that's true in the store, too. And the bank. And even in line for the bathroom at a concert or sporting event).
• If you're in the middle seat, do you get both armrests? The public says no (57%) because the public has apparently never sat in the middle. Brad says: The middle seat should get both armrests. Or at least the main portion of them. The window and aisle seats each get a full armrest on one side and should get at most a small portion on the inside.
• Can you call someone before you get off the plane? The public says no (69%) because it's irritating to listen in on other people's conversations. Brad says: No, unless you have a really interesting conversation that I can then repeat to whomever I see at my destination. Then it's OK.
• Can you chat up your seatmate? The public narrowly says yes (52%), because it's friendly. The public obviously didn't sit next to a guy I sat by last year who insisted on showing me hundreds (literally hundreds) of photos of his relatives. On his phone. Hundreds!  Brad says: I guess it's OK as long as you recognize the body language of "I don't want to talk." And you don't show 40 phone photos of your grandson playing a Little League baseball game.

So next time you fly, keep this in mind. The person by the window controls the shade, the person in the middle gets two armrests, don't rush off the plane or make an immediate phone call, and don't show me hundreds of photos on your phone.

And for crying out loud, don't try to bring a 3.5-ounce drink through security! A 3.4-ounce drink is fine, but more than that? Insanity!

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@outlook.com.

Experts have a great idea to make recycling even more confusing

The experts want to make recycling even more confusing!

A recent Axios article brought what the writer and editors obviously thought was good news: Soon there would be QR codes to assist us with the "hyper-local" rules of recycling. 

When I read it, I nearly spit out my coffee, which made my next decision even more difficult: Can you recycle coffee if it includes spit?

The article said soon we will be able to use QR codes – those barcodes that an app can read to take you to a specific website – to determine how to determine whether you can recycle your yogurt container, cardboard box or insulation packaging. And where to put it.

Once you scan the code on the package, it will interact with the ZIP code you enter to tell you what type of recycling (or not) it is and in which bin you should put it.

Simple, right?

Nope. It sounds unnecessarily complicated and confusing.

I'm supposed to scan each item and see whether it goes in the Dumpster (where I live), the green recycling bin, the cardboard bin, or in one of the myriad other recycling options?

Each item. Individually.

If I sound grumpy, it's because recycling has become such guesswork. What goes to the landfill? What's recyclable and if so, what type of recycling is it? It keeps getting more confusing and just when you think you have it figured out ("OK, so pizza boxes can go with green recycling if there's no pizza left on them. But if there's any grease, it goes with the cardboard"), the rules change.

Pretty soon it becomes easier to just put stuff in the regular garbage, which defeats the purpose.

Most of us care about recycling, which is good. We need less garbage. We need to reuse as much as we can. But recycling rules are splitting into those who understand the rules and those who don't.

The experts are baffled and angry when we're confused about where to put our used Starbucks cups (Does it matter if there's coffee left? Do the lid and cup go in different places?). They're flabbergasted if we put plastic bags in the blue recycling bin because they have the recycling symbol. Don't we know better?

It feels like the recycling rules are constantly changing. Furthermore, what's recyclable in Fairfield might go in a different bin in Rio Vista.

According to the Axios article, the Recycling Partnership–a nonprofit focused on this issue–says 60% of us are confused by recycling rules. My guess is that the remaining 40% just throw everything in the trash, eliminating "confusion."

But now the advocates say there's a solution that will fix everything. We can have different rules in different places and there will be no problems. Put QR codes on everything. Then people will pull out their phones, scan the QR code and know what to do.

Except . . .

Most of us will struggle to remember how to use the QR code app. Then we'll forget that we're supposed to scan the code off the packaging, even if we can find it. Then we'll forget our ZIP code. Then we won't know which of the bins is "compost" and which is "recycle."

Why don't we just adopt universal recycling rules?

Why don't we stop having super-local recycling rules that change every three months?

Why don't we just have two or three bins, marked clearly.

Too easy? Well, this part is simple: if you're reading this in a physical newspaper, you can probably compost it.

You can recycle a plastic bag if it came in that.

Unless the bag is wet.

But if you're reading it online, your electronics must be recycled as e-waste.

Unless, of course, the rules are different where you live.

Or the rules have already changed.

Boy, that QR code will fix everything!

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@outlook.com.

Getting older is tough, but nobody told us about these parts

I knew aging would be hard, because I always heard old people talking about it.

"Getting old isn't for wimps," they'd say, as they complained about something that seemed wimpy.

Older people groaned when they stood. They walked slower. They couldn't hear things as well. They would say (always laughing, as if they invented the line), "If I'd known I was going to live this long, I would have taken better care of myself." Hah hah hah.

That wasn't going to happen to me. I would take care of myself when I was young. Also, I knew what to expect, so I wouldn't be surprised.

I was ready for my hearing to get worse.

I was ready for gray hair (although not in my 30s, when it started).

I was prepared to need more naps and for arthritis to hurt my hands.

But nobody told me about the most obvious signs of getting older.

As a public service for those of you who consider yourself young, here are three surprising things about getting older.

• Your legs get stiff quickly. When I was young, I could drive three or four hours, get out, stretch my legs for a few minutes and feel fine. Now? I drive 45 minutes (45 minutes!) and when I get out of my car, it feels like I've been behind the wheel for 12 nonstop hours. My legs feel tight. What the heck? I exercise regularly. My legs are fine. Nobody told me this.
• Handrails are extremely valuable. While I haven't fallen (or even come close) while descending stairs, going down them is way more jarring than it used to be. I need at least a flight of stairs before I have any bounce in my legs, so where did the muscle (or ligaments or tendons or whatever gives you bounce) go? Sometimes it feels like I'm descending stairs on stilts. Handrails are suddenly important and I am always ready to grab them. Nobody told me this.
• Toilet breaks are part of every decision. This is the most consistent factor in my daily life: If I'm going to drive across town, maybe I should go to the bathroom first. I'm going to take a nap? Let me make a quick trip to the bathroom. Going for a short walk? I'll visit the bathroom first. Time to eat? Maybe I'll visit the bathroom first. Planning to watch an hour-long TV show? Hold on, let me go to the bathroom. Need to walk across the room? Well, as long as I'm up, let me hit the bathroom. Nobody told me this.

There are plenty of other things about aging. It's harder to read small print. Characters on TV mumble too much. If I'd known I was going to live this long, I'd have taken better care of myself.

Hah hah hah.

There are more aging tips, but let me visit the bathroom first.

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@outlook.com.