Plan gives new meaning to 'changing seasons'

Let's face it: Our calendar is broken. It makes no sense. It needs to be fixed.

We just passed New Year's Day, which doesn't seem like the start of a year, but just as a continuation of winter. Other than Big Calendar, the industry that makes its money by selling 12-month wall posters at Christmas, who thinks a new year should start a week after Christmas? That's wrong.

Similarly, we all consider the first two weeks of June "summer": Kids are getting out of school, Memorial Day is behind us, it's closing on 100 degrees.

It's still spring, technically.

The whole calendar is a mess and I have a plan to fix it.

Sure, it requires moving around what we consider "seasons" and it ignores the ideas of solstices and equinoxes (both of which I believe are only observed by witches), but it reflects what's actually already there. The Stanhope Calendar Plan reflects the real way we consider seasons.

Unless you're a member of the Flat Earth Society, you have to realize that it's time for change. Open your mind and get ready to be convinced.

In my plan:

Winter is Nov. 1 through the end of February. Sure, it's four months, but so what? It's winter! We consider it winter once we get past Halloween and by the time March rolls around, baseball teams are in spring training. It's not winter training, it's spring training. Winter ends March 1! My plan recognizes that the coldest weather (in the northern hemisphere ) occurs in the winter.

Spring is March 1 until the Thursday before Memorial Day. That's when we have crazy weather, it gets warmer and it's the time that we make the transition from winter to summer. Spring starts when March starts. And Memorial Day weekend goes from "the unofficial start of summer" to the official start of summer.

Summer is Memorial Day weekend through Labor Day weekend. Summer is the season when the weather is warm, kids are out of school and people take "summer vacations." Does it still feel like summer in mid-September? No. Because it isn't summer anymore. It's fall (see next entry). I would also require schools to be on vacation during this period. No school in summer.

Fall is the day after Labor Day through the end of October. It's the shortest season (and I'd be willing to negotiate and let fall extend until after Thanksgiving if required in the agreement with Big Calendar), but that's fall. School's back in. Football starts. Leaves fall. New shows start on network TV.

One more change is that New Year's Day moves from Jan. 1 to March 1.

Isn't that a more logical start of the year? It's the start of spring, when things are getting green, people are moving outside and optimism returns after the long (four-month) winter. As a bonus, it moves the holiday away from Christmas and gives workers a day off when we could use it more. The last day of February (the 29th, this year) becomes New Year's Eve. We start a new year and a new season at the same time.

My conclusion: The Byrds had it right when they quoted the Bible five decades ago: To everything there is a season. And our calendar has the seasons all messed up.

Under the Stanhope Calendar Plan, we get accurate seasons and a New Year's Day that reflects reality.

Now back to an actual four-month winter of discontent with the current calendar system.

Brad Stanhope is a former Daily Republic editor. Reach him at bradstanhope@hotmail.com.

Playoff to determine biggest story of 2015

It's the end of the year and competition is healthy. Which means it's time for my annual story-of-the-year tournament.

Unlike other media outlets, who merely rank the top stories of the year without letting you know exactly how they decided, I believe in letting them decide it on the field.

Also unlike other media outlets, I add personal events of 2015 to the tournament. The biggest stories are those that affect you (or, in this case, me) right?

So let the tournament begin. Eight stories in a three-round, single-elimination tournament to decide the biggest news event of 2015.

Quarterfinals
Mrs. Brad and I travel to Hawaii vs. Drought continues.

Every few years (nine, in this case), Mrs. Brad and I return to Hawaii for a week of relaxation and fun. We did it in November, for the first time since our kids became adults. Aloha, right? Meanwhile, the rain stayed away for a third straight year and we finally got what we feared: Horrific fires in Northern California. The Hawaii trip was fun, but the drought description includes the word "horrific." Drought advances.

Paris terror attacks vs. Installation of "trashketball" hoop in my cubicle.

On the surface, this seems ridiculous – how can a Nerf basketball hoop that's attached to the wall of my cubicle at work be important? Well . . . I used it nearly every day this year. It came into play frequently, while the Paris terrorist attacks were a news story that reminded me of what I already knew. So . . . oh, I can't do it. Terror attacks were a huge story. They advance to the semifinals.

Supreme Court decision on gay marriage vs. Warriors win NBA championship.

These have more in common than you think. Both happened this summer. Both prompted big celebrations in the Bay Area. Both angered right-wing Cleveland Cavaliers fans. (OK, the last one was a stretch.) However, anyone paying attention saw the gay marriage decision coming. No one saw the Warrior big season coming until things got rolling. Therefore, for winning their first championship since 1975, the Warriors advance.

2016 presidential race gets off to a fast start vs. Caitlyn Jenner saga.

Rand Paul's hair. Donald Trump's bluster. Hillary Clinton's emails. Ben Carson's biography. Caitlyn Jenner's interviews. The presidential race and the Jenner gender identity change got more media coverage than merited, but both were so fascinating we couldn't take our eyes off them. However, the presidential race will affect us for the next four or eight years, while Caitlyn Jenner will likely be a footnote to reality TV history. The presidential race advances.

Semifinals
Drought continues vs. Paris terror attacks

There's no way to say this without sounding insensitive, so I won't. Drought wins. (Send your complaints about my insensitivity to kelvinsbrother@sbcglobal.net.)

Warriors win title vs. Presidential race starts

Which is more compelling TV: Steph Curry's jumper or Donald Trump's facial expressions? Which seems more otherworldly: Draymond Green's energy or Ted Cruz's face? Which family dynasty is greater: Mychael and Klay Thompson or Bill and Hillary Clinton? I know my answers and I'll put it this way: I didn't watch every presidential debate in 2015. I watched every Warriors playoff game. Dubs win. Again.

Finals
Drought continues vs. Warriors win title

This one's tough, but here's the difference: The rain drought has lasted a few years. The Warriors' title drought lasted 40 years. If it continues to be dry until 2051, we'll talk. Until then . . . Splash Brothers win another title.

Brad Stanhope is a former Daily Republic editor. Reach him at bradstanhope@hotmail.com.

Get ready to prove your local knowledge

Hello and welcome back to the annual Solano County knowledge test. You live here (or have some connection to the county) and should know a lot about Solano, one of 18 original California counties (from 1850, of course. You already knew that.).

That's where I come in. Consider me the DMV of Solano knowledge, giving you a test to allow you to keep your knowledge license. Remember, next year you can make an appointment!

What follows are 20 questions. Write down your answers on a separate piece of paper (or on the margin to the left of the community calendar) and see how you do. And as always, only Dixon Ticonderoga No. 2 pencils are counted.

Let's.

Get.

Started!

1. Within 50,000, how many people live in Solano County?

2. Name the four interstate freeways in Solano County.

3. Name the five state highways in Solano County.

4. The man who dominated the world land-speed record book 50 years ago lives in Solano County. Who is this legendary driver (the Beach Boys wrote a song about him!) and in which Solano County city does he live?

5. Name the seven Solano County cities.

6. Name the seven dwarfs.

7. What is the largest park in Solano County?

8. What was the most valuable agricultural product in Solano County in 2014?

9. Who is Sem Yeto and why is he in this quiz?

10. If you started at the West Texas Street exit in Fairfield and drove 1,000 miles east on Interstate 80, in what state would you be?

11. Within 1,000, how many people (military and civilian) work at Travis Air Force Base?

12. What company is the largest private employer (in terms of number of employees) in Solano County?

13. What is the largest family owned newspaper in Solano County?

14. Name at least four of the five Solano County supervisors.

15. In what month is the Dixon May Fair?

16. What two Solano County cities were once the capital of California?

17. What is the only city in the county with more men than women?

18. Within two, how many fingers am I holding up right now?

19. What was Travis Air Force Base called when it was founded in 1942?

20. How did you do on this test?

ANSWERS

1. The 2014 estimate (most recent available) was 425,169.

2. Interstates 80, 680, 780, 505.

3. Highways 12, 29, 37, 84 and 113.

4. Craig Breedlove, Rio Vista.

5. Benicia, Dixon, Fairfield, Rio Vista, Suisun City, Vacaville, Vallejo.

6. Sleepy, Doc, Grumpy, Bashful, Happy, Sneezy, Dopey.

7. Rockville Hills Park (633 acres) in Fairfield, which edges out Pena Adobe/Lagoon Valley Park in Vacaville (470 acres).

8. Tomatoes, with a crop value of just more than $46 million.

9. Sem Yeto is the real name of Chief Solano, the county's namesake.

10. Wyoming (Specifically, 4 miles east of Fort Steele, Wyoming).

11. Travis' workforce is listed as 13,414. That includes 7,200 active duty personnel.

12. Kaiser Permanente in Vallejo, with nearly 4,000 employees. Another 1,000 Kaiser employees work in Vacaville.

13. Daily Republic, brother!

14. Erin Hannigan, John Vasquez, Linda Seifert, Jim Spering, Skip Thomson.

15. May. Of course.

16. Benicia (1853) and Vallejo (1852, 1853).

17. Vacaville, which is 53 percent male – due to the approximately 6,300 inmates at the two major prisons there.

18. Four.

19. Fairfield Army Air Base

20. OK.

SCORING

16-20: An expert. Tell the folks at Six Flags Discovery Kingdom in Vallejo that I said to let you in free.

12-15: Pretty solid. Treat yourself to a free tour of the Jelly Belly Factory on me.

8-11: Well, it was tough, but you tried. Ride around Fairfield-Suisun City on the bus for an hour and contemplate how you could get better.

0-7: Go watch a film at the drive-in theater on North Texas Street. You remember it, right? You don't? Well, it's not there anymore!

Brad Stanhope is a former Daily Republic editor. Reach him at bradstanhope@hotmail.com.

'Star Wars' movie is going to be fantastic!

When the new "Star Wars" movie comes out this week, no one will be more excited than me. It's Star Wars!

Who doesn't like stars? Or wars? Put them together? Fantastic.

While some may accuse me of jumping on the bandwagon of a hot cultural phenomenon, I've been a fan of "Star Wars" since I was a kid. I've always loved Captain Kirk. The relationship between Kirk and Hans Olo was one of my favorite aspects of the first movies.

When Disney announced that it was adding three new films to the series, I was thrilled. I, of course, enjoyed the first three movies (particularly "Luke Skywalker and the Temple of Doom") but unlike a lot of other fans, I was also enthralled by the subsequent trio of films, which were actually prequels.

"Star Wars" fans know that, of course.

Like many people, I enjoyed "Episode I: Prince Caspian" and "Episode II: Shaft in Africa," but the highlight of those films was undoubtedly "Episode III: Yoda and the Goblet of Fire." I still have the special cup I stood in line to get at Taco Bell when Episode II came out. Shaft in space? Nothing better.

The anticipation of the new film (called, of course "Episode VII: The Force Awakens" because it parallels Chuck Norris's 1979 masterpiece "A Force of One" and features Norris in the role of a silent, terrifying assassin), reminds many of us of the excitement of earlier blockbusters. A huge group of "Star Wars" fans in costume (I hope someone dresses up as Neo!) is expected to flood theaters overnight Thursday to be the first to see it.

The closest I can think would be the electricity when "Three Men and a Little Lady" came out in 1990.

Greatest.

Sequel.

Ever.

The thing that a lot of people don't realize – but those true "Star Wars" fans among us do – is the impact the George Lucas series has on other parts of culture.

For instance, the iconic TV show "Star Search" probably was inspired by "Star Wars." They're both two-word titles and both start with "Star." Do the math.

Similarly, "Storage Wars," "Cake Wars," Wedding Wars" and "Cupcake Wars" all bring "Star Wars" to mind. And what would our world be like without them? Like a world without Princess Layla, Obi Juan Canopy and Garth Mall, three of my favorite "Star Wars" characters.

What about Star Jones?

Seriously: What about Star Jones? Does anyone know what happened to her? I hadn't thought of her until I wrote the previous paragraph.

Anyway, "Star Wars" isn't just a great film, it has made a huge impact on our culture, since the first scene in the initial movie, when Luke Skywalker says, "I think we're gonna need a bigger boat!" As someone who has watched each movie very closely and who tries to live his life by the mantra said by famous "Star Wars" actor Leonard Nimoy ("Live long and prosper"), I hope this episode is just as good as the first six.

If you go to an opening-night showing, please don't spoil it for me. I want to find out for myself whether the boy wizard lives.

I just love "Star Wars." And Star Jones, in case she Googled her name and is reading this.

Brad Stanhope is a former Daily Republic editor who actually saw "Star Wars" in a theater, long ago and far away. Reach him at bradstanhope@hotmail.com.

'It's a politically incorrect life' and other notes

Emptying out my notebook with just 25 days left in 2015 – after which we start an election year!

Which means, of course, we're still in the presidential preseason. Yikes.

On to the topics du jour . . .

• I love "It's a Wonderful Life," the iconic 1946 film that celebrates the impact of one man's life: George Bailey, played by James Stewart. I'm old enough to remember when the movie was in the public domain and every TV station could play it as often as it liked, leading to a funny scene in one "Cheers" episode when Woody explained that the local station was hosting something it called "It's a Wonderful Month."

Still . . .

There are elements in the film that would be considered laughable in a current movie. And I'm not talking about George's ear problem keeping him out of the military or the crazy idea of putting a gym floor over a swimming pool (mold problem, anyone?).

How about George's abusive relationship with store owner Mr. Gower? First of all, George seems too young to be working. Secondly, when Gower slaps him in the ear, it was workplace abuse, right? Right? The owner basically punched a kid!

In 2015, Bailey would file a lawsuit and be a social media star.

Then there's the idea that Mary's life would be wasted in a non-George Bailey world because she would be an unmarried librarian. What? A woman not getting married at 18? A woman with a career? And of course, working in a library changed Mary's personality from a bubbly girl to a haggard old maid.

Finally, there's the elephant in the room: Uncle Billy's alcoholism. Oh yeah, it's charming as he loses people's money and gets drunk. Charming Uncle Billy. While he wasn't George's responsibility, George sure was his enabler. Both could use some counseling.

Yeah, it's a wonderful life. One with workplace abuse, sexual discrimination and alcoholism.

• One of my favorite Facebook pages launched about a month ago and is called "Fairfield Memes."

It's filled with Internet-friendly photos that have sayings about Fairfield and Suisun City. A warning: If you're sensitive to the reputation of the cities, you might get offended. OK, you will get offended.

There are plenty of images of crime, drug abuse and disrepair. But the spirit of the page's founder (who remains anonymous) is actually one of pride, echoed by most of those who visit the page.

It's more of a feeling of "sure, there are problems here, but it's my town." Kind of like embracing the dysfunction in your life. To be like George Bailey.

Fairfield Memes, the "blogger" version. Check it out.

• Am I the only person who wonders whether the makers of the old Dixon Ticonderoga No. 2 pencils had an illegal monopoly during the fill-in-the-blank school-test days of the 1960s and 1970s?

Why did the tests require No. 2 pencils? What was wrong with other numbers? Did the Dixon Ticonderoga leadership pay off the education officials to make their pencils the only acceptable lead for those early tests?

That would be like having online tests now, but saying they can only be taken on Dell computers, right?

• There's plenty of season to go, but this seems obvious: This year's Golden State Warriors are the greatest team in the history of Bay Area pro sports.

They're coming off a championship, they seemingly can't lose and they have the reigning league MVP in Stephen Curry.

If you're not a sports fan, consider adopting the Warriors. They're likable, entertaining and keep winning. And in Curry, they have the greatest shooter in the history of Earth.

Brad Stanhope is a former Daily Republic editor. Reach him at bradstanhope@hotmail.com.

Loser's view after war on Christmas

Life was different before the war. But of course, anyone who has lived through war knows that – particularly when you're on the losing side.

Now all that's left is to hide the scars and rebuild our lives as shattered, broken people.

And hope to someday recover.

It seemed unlikely we would lose. How could we, when we were right? We had the power. We had popular support. We had 2,000 years of history. Or so we thought.

Who could have known that it could go so wrong, that our strategy would backfire and that we would give up everything?

Now we live in humiliation, the land of the conquered in which the winners write the history. Nobody will know our story, because we are the vanquished.

The war on Christmas is over and we lost.

The battlefield is littered with "Jesus is the reason for the season" buttons and "Keep Christ in Christmas" coffee mugs.

I'll never forget when it became official. Now we'll never say "Merry Christmas" if we're working at a store and management forbids it. We can no longer force others to sing songs about Jesus. We can't complain when we get cups at Starbucks that don't acknowledge Christmas.

We lost the war.

Oh, sure, there are some who say it's making too big a deal of it to call it a "war."

They say veterans of World War II or Korea or Vietnam or Iraq survived real wars, but they don't know how it feels to go into a Starbucks and NOT GET A SPECIAL CUP THAT SAYS "MERRY CHRISTMAS."

They don't know how it feels when a cashier says "Happy Holidays."

They don't know the anguish of listening to a radio station that plays Christmas music without traditional hymns.

I experienced all those things and know as much about war as any bomb survivor or soldier who was trapped in the trenches during World War I. They had to breathe poison gas and face constant bombardment, but we have to work at places that call the Christmas party a "holiday party."

It's heartbreaking. I suspect I will have post-traumatic stress disorder for the rest of my life because of this war.

The war on Christmas is over. We lost.

Now we believers retreat to all that's left: A commemoration of the birth of Jesus.

The admission that the crass commercialization of the traditional holiday has little to do with the birth of a savior 20 centuries ago.

Recognition that artificial trees and peppy songs and wrapping paper and special coffee flavors have less to do with the arrival of a promised savior than they do with making money.

How could anyone survive in a nation that doesn't recognize and celebrate Christianity as its official religion?

Just think of how Jesus would have suffered if he faced that. What if first-century Rome was a pagan, non-Christian nation that was filled with other traditions and didn't welcome a savior who came to the world as a poor baby?

Wait. What?

Brad Stanhope is a former Daily Republic editor. Reach him at bradstanhope@hotmail.com.

Don't panic, but the Black Death may be returning

Don't panic. Don't go crazy. Don't do anything dangerous.

I'm sure the health officials are keeping things quiet for a good reason. I'm sure there's no reason to get anxious.

BUT A GIRL IN OREGON HAS THE PLAGUE!

Pardon me while I get a paper bag into which I can breathe to prevent hyperventilation.

The plague.

In a neighboring state.

Specifically, Bend, Oregon, where my in-laws live and Mrs. Brad and I occasionally visit.

SHE HAS THE PLAGUE. Seriously.

According to news accounts on Halloween (HALLOWEEN!), the teenage girl went into the hospital after she apparently contracted the plague from an infected flea. . .

A GIRL.

HAS.

THE.

PLAGUE.

. . . while on a hunting trip. She appeared to be recovering, so things seem OK.

I felt good after reading that. Until the reporter casually mentioned that it was the 15TH CASE OF THE BUBONIC PLAGUE IN THE UNITED STATES THIS YEAR.

FOUR PEOPLE HAVE DIED.

OH. MY. GOODNESS.

This is the PLAGUE. This isn't the flu or a common cold. It's the bubonic plague, which could bring a recurrence of the Black Death, which killed one-third of humanity in the Middle Ages.

Sure, it was a long time ago, but think about this: It killed one-third of all people. If it happened in the 19th or 20th century, we would have had just two Bee Gees, two Stooges, the Kingston Duo and only the "Good and Bad" – no Ugly. What if Destiny's Child had no Beyoncé? Tragic.

Can you imagine? Oh, sure, you can say things are different now. We have modern medicine. We have global communication. We have frozen pizzas and big-box stores. We have Oprah Winfrey.

But is it possible that THE BLACK DEATH STARTED THIS WAY? Were there perhaps just a few people in 1340 who had it, but then it spread? Did they ignore it – like the mainstream media largely ignored this year's 15 CASES OF BUBONIC PLAGUE – and let it spread?

I'm sure it's nothing. Except for this: The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention recently also announced that the Pentagon may have mislabeled, improperly stored and shipped samples of potentially infectious plague bacteria.

DID YOU READ THAT? Good, because I don't fully understand it and I don't work in a Pentagon warehouse. Since I'm not interested in searching for the ark of the covenant that Indiana Jones found, it should be OK.

Right? RIGHT?

Let's all calm down. I'm sure it's nothing serious. I'm sure they're in control. And even though the Black Death killed 75 million to 200 million people in the Middle Ages, none of them would be alive today, anyway, right?

We've got plenty of reason to be confident. The girl was hospitalized. The medical people seemed calm, at least publicly. Only 15 people have . . .

Only 15 people have . . .

FIFTEEN PEOPLE HAVE CAUGHT THE PLAGUE IN THE UNITED STATES THIS YEAR.

And the girl in Oregon likely got it from a flea bite, just like millions of people in the Middle Ages.

And I'm "middle-aged."

Uh-oh. Did I just sneeze?

I'm sure it's nothing to worry about.

Brad Stanhope is a former Daily Republic editor. Reach him at bradstanhope@hotmail.com.

Sandwich Islands: Best thing since sliced bread

Aloha and hand me some lunch meat between two slices of bread!

Mrs. Brad and I recently returned from the Sandwich Islands and this seems an appropriate place to share our memories.

The Sandwich Islands? Well, you may call them something else – most likely the Hawaiian Islands. I've got nothing against the people who call them "Hawaii." I'm just old-school.

And to those who think it's baloney to call them the Sandwiches, a reminder they were named that by Capt. James Cook, who "discovered" them in 1778. By "discovered," I mean it in the same way that I "discovered" "Mad Men" five years after it debuted on American television.

I call them the Sandwich Islands for a very simple reason. They are named after John Montagu, the fourth Earl of Sandwich. When Cook named the islands after Sandwich, it was an honor, multiplied by the fact that there's very little chance that anything else could ever be named after him. If we stop calling them the Sandwich Islands, the name Sandwich probably goes away.

I told that to Mrs. Brad as we ate some peanut butter and jelly, smeared between two slices of bread on Kauai, the northernmost of the Sandwich Islands.

(Side note: If I read about witches while I sat there eating that food, it would be about a "sand witch," right? Too bad for John Montagu that it never stuck. So he gets the islands named after him.)

The islands, of course, widely became known as the Hawaiian Islands in the late 19th century, which created a po' boy in Sandwich.

The beauty of the Sandwich Islands is that the weather is predictable. It was our third trip there – a triple-decker Sandwich? – and the climate has been the same every time. About 85 degrees as the high, 75 as the low. Humid. Residents – Sandwichians? – likely don't need long pants or jackets as they enjoy their cold desserts.

I know that because Mrs. Brad and I spoke about that while sitting at a local restaurant, enjoying one such treat. It was two thin slices of chocolate biscuit with vanilla ice cream between them. It's an ice cream-between-slices item, I presume. Don't know for sure, but it was good. It was the perfect kind of ice cream dessert for the Sandwich Islands.

The best thing about our entire week was relaxation as we enjoyed beaches, hikes, swimming and food while sleeping at a place I called the Club Sandwich.

The food? Delicious. We had bacon, lettuce and tomatoes between slices of bread; we had cheese between two slices of toast; we had several other great meals between (I wish there was a word for the process of inserting something between two other things!) the aforementioned meals. The one thing we didn't have? We ate no tuna on Sandwich.

So if you ask what we liked most about our trip to the Sandwich Islands, it's this: The variety of lunch food and delicious ice cream desserts.

We give a big salute to John Montagu. Thanks to me, no one will forget him, even Inspector Clouseau. Because even a French dip will now remember Sandwich.

Aloha.

Brad Stanhope is a former Daily Republic editor. Reach him at bradstanhope@hotmail.com.

Really: Some things are worth keeping

When I was a teenager, my dad had a container for tortilla chips. They were his favorite snack, so my stepmom would buy him massive bags of Bien Padre chips (made in my hometown) and he would eat them nearly every night.

The funny thing? His container.

It was an aluminum box about the size of a slice of bread that was assuredly intended for some other use. Maybe to hold food. It was aluminum and clearly intended for a single use.

My dad didn't get rid of it. He used it every night. Week after week, month after month.

Year after year.

That aluminum container held literally hundreds of thousands of tortilla chips through the decades as he watched the evening news or golf or read the latest racy Harold Robbins novel. He kept it year after year, refusing to use a bowl or even get a new version.

When Mrs. Brad and I moved away from our hometown decades ago, my dad still had that chip holder. I don't think he still does, but I wouldn't be surprised if I visited and he pulled it out.

He is a child of the Depression: He kept a cheap, replaceable container that could easily have been thrown away. Because it worked.

Fast-forward a generation. I'm older than he was when he started using that container. I've raised two sons, who when asked in their teens about my values, said that I didn't waste money. (It probably wasn't phrased that way. It probably included the word "cheap" and an accusation that all of their friends had fathers who more freely handed out money. I consider those charges to be unsubstantiated and won't dignify them with a response.)

Recently, while Mrs. Brad and I were traveling, she noticed my daily pill holder. (OK. So I've admitted I'm old, cheap and have a container to remind me to take my assortment of cholesterol and arthritis medicine. Get off my lawn!)

It's one of those plastic versions, with the first letter of each day of the week on the compartment. Nice and big, so the old eyes can read it.

"Is that broken?" she asked, looking at the container that appeared to have been run over by an 18-wheeler.

"No. I fixed it."

Then I tried to change the subject. But it didn't work. She asked some more.

It was fixed! It wasn't broken! The lid for one of the dates (Thursday) broke off, which is admittedly unacceptable. You can't have a random statin pill migrating to the wrong day. Or a low-level aspirin slipping into Friday's slot and causing an aspirin overdose!

Rather than throw out the container, I fixed the broken lid. I used Scotch tape.

I told Mrs. Brad this. She looked at me skeptically.

"Why don't you just get a new one? Or you can have mine," she said, offering me her "travel" pill container.

"No. Mine is fine," I said. "Yours is too big. It won't fit as well on my shelf. This is fine."

She raised her eyebrows at me.

But I didn't want to buy a new pill container. It would be a waste of money. The taped-up version works fine.

Of course, those containers cost $2. I could easily replace it and not suffer financial hardship.

I don't know why I don't just get a new one. I guess it's the same philosophy that my dad had all those years ago: If it works, don't change it. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. And if it does break, fix it with tape and keep using it.

It's a philosophy that leads to hoarding, I guess. But let's be honest: His tortilla chip container was ridiculous.

My pill container? It makes sense.

Right?

Right?

Brad Stanhope is a former Daily Republic editor. Reach him at bradstanhope@hotmail.com.

Color me excited for Hall of Fame announcement

Like most Americans, I'll be clicking "refresh" on my Internet browser Thursday morning, awaiting the big announcement.

This is no game! It's time to find out the new inductees to The National Toy Hall of Fame in Rochester, New York.

My money is on the scooter and Twister. But I hope that Wiffle ball makes it and won't complain if coloring book gets inside the lines.

Induction into the Toy Hall of Fame, of course, is one of the biggest stories of the year. And this year's field of 12 nominees for just two spots is one of the strongest in memory. In addition to the aforementioned four nominees, there's also American Girl dolls, Battleship, Jenga, Playmobil, puppet, super soaker, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and the top.

Can you imagine a Hall of Fame without puppets? Or the beloved top? You will likely have to, for at least another year. Because they're unlikely to get enough support for enshrinement.

My support for Twister comes from my childhood, when it was a boxed game that was physical, unlike The Game of Life (2010 inductee) or Aggravation.

Scooters get my backing because of the late-1990s Christmas when every kid in my neighborhood (including the two Stanhope squires) received Razor scooters. There were 12-wide races down our street – the kind of signature moment that Hall of Famers need.

As you likely know, there are already 56 toys in the Hall of Fame. Twister (or Battleship) would be the fifth board game, joining Candy Land, Life, Monopoly and Scrabble (I don't consider checkers, chess or dominoes – all inductees – board games).

Hall of Fame watchers speculate that puppet could create the kind of controversy that erupted when cardboard box (2005) stick (2008) and ball (2009) were inducted as general items. More than one critic wondered if invisible friend or rocks might be future inductees – a chorus that only got louder when blanket made it in 2011.

Although this year's field is very strong (expect some significant protests from Generation X members if super soaker and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are left out for a baby boomer toy), it still will pale in comparison to the strongest classes since the shrine opened in 1998.

Other than the initial class of 11 (including Barbie and Legos, the Babe Ruth and Ty Cobb of toys), most Toy Hall of Fame experts consider the 2000 class the best ever. That, of course, was the year of bicycle, jacks, jump rope, Mr. Potato Head and slinky.

All we can hope is that we avoid the debacle of 2013, when chess and rubber duck (neither of which have been a part of this columnist's life) made up the entire class. There were rumors of a rebellion among the other toys, which conspiracy theorists cite as the reason for last year's induction of green Army men into the shrine: A bargain to keep the military on the sidelines.

Here's what we know: Whether it's a board game, a doll or a old-school item, this year's field guarantees two happy toys that will be high as a kite (2007).

But making the final choice is as difficult as solving a Rubik's Cube (2014) or jigsaw puzzle (2002).

Play time ends Thursday.

Brad Stanhope is a former Daily Republic editor. Reach him at bradstanhope@hotmail.com.