The naked truth about medical patients and those paper robes

So I was at the doctor's office recently, ready for a minor procedure.

The physician's assistant did all her work – taking my blood pressure and pulse, asking what medications I take, confirming my pharmacy, asking why I was there (aren't all of those things written down? Didn't I already tell multiple people these things and fill out a form about them? Is this an effort to catch me in a lie?).

She informed me that as a diabetic, I would have my feet checked, so I needed to take off my shoes and socks. Then she handed me one of those paper robes and told me to put it on and have the opening in the front.

She started to leave.

"Um, I have a question," I asked.

She stopped, no doubt wishing I would just follow orders.

"What do I need to take off?" I asked.

"What?"

"For the robe. What clothes do I take off?"

The doctor needed to see my torso, but the physician's assistant handed me a robe. And told me to put it on, with the opening in front. Was I supposed to totally undress?

"Just your shirt."

"OK. One more question."

I'm pretty sure they love me at the doctor's office and find my curiosity charming. The physician's assistant looked up. I could ask my question.

"Do people sometimes take off too many clothes? Do you sometimes come back in the room and they're naked? Maybe naked for a blood pressure test?"

I barely got it out, because I was starting to giggle, thinking of the awkward situation of a doctor walking in for a consultation and the patient sitting there, buck naked except for a paper robe.

"Yes. That happens sometimes. A lot of times in the summer, because it's warm." Then she left.

What?

What?

I laughed at the idea of someone mistakenly taking off too many clothes. I envisioned someone naked except for a paper robe while an uncomfortable doctor looks in their ears or checks out a spot on their arm. Maybe someone with no pants on as the doctor simply asks them questions about their eyesight.

But she gave a different answer: She said that people took off their clothes a lot in the summer. Because it was hot.

Did she mean that some people go to the doctor's office and disrobe because they get overheated? That some patients would prefer to sit on an uncomfortable bench in a stranger's office while wearing a paper robe that keeps opening . . . because it's hot?

That can't be true, right? I mean, I get that people misunderstand directions – after all, had I not asked for clarification, I might have disrobed for an appointment where my doctor just had to check out my torso (I envision her walking in and saying, "What do you think you're doing, you freak?" while I tried to keep the paper robe closed and wondered the same thing).

But do some people enjoy disrobing at the doctor's office? To wear that dreadful paper robe?

That can't be true. I'm going to presume the physician's assistant didn't understand my question, although I'm not sure how that would happen.

People don't needlessly get undressed at the doctor's office to cool off, do they?

I may never again go to the doctor during the summer months. Who knows what happened in the room before I got there?

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@outlook.com.