Threat to coffee makes climate change real

My introduction to the idea of global warming (2017 version: climate change) came during childhood, when the big threat to the environment – other than thermonuclear war and the fact that people could smoke anywhere – was aerosol gas.

By using aerosol cans for deodorant, hairspray and cleaning products, we put a hole in the ozone. It was heating up the planet.

My dad's reaction? Since we lived in a town that rarely warmed beyond 70 degrees, he was all for it. "I go outside every day and spray several cans," he would tell his buddies. "If it gets about five or 10 degrees warmer here, it will be perfect."

Hah, hah, hah.

My amusement – and distrust – of his views manifested themselves in my adulthood. Like most people, I believe the world is warming. Like most scientists (I'm not a scientist, despite my predilection for white coats), I believe humans are responsible for much of it.

But like most people, I tend to ignore it.

It will get fixed. Smart people will figure out a solution. We're getting better. This won't affect us for generations . . . blah, blah, blah.

At my worst, I bring echoes of my dad: If the oceans rise, it will just make my Suisun City house that much closer to the ocean. It will drive up my home's value.

Hah, hah, hah.

Recently, I saw something in the newspaper that made me panic. It made me the Al Gore of Solano County.

Did you know that global warming threatens the ability to grow coffee beans?

Oh. Em. Gee.

A study found that Ethiopia, the world's fifth-largest coffee producer, could lose up to 60 percent of its suitable farming land by the end of this century because of climate change.

Another report from World Coffee Research (which has offices in the break room of the Gallup Organization), says the demand for coffee will double by 2050, but the suitable land to grow it will be cut in half.

This makes sense, because most of the world's coffee is produced near the equator, which is where climate change will have the quickest effect. A recent study by the University of Vermont found global warming could reduce coffee-growing areas in Latin America by as much as 88 percent by 2050.

That is a long time from now (although I remember when 2000 was impossibly in the future), but this is reason to panic. Do you think President Donald Trump would have pulled us out of the Paris Accord (which I thought was a Toyota model until I learned otherwise) had he known that it could ruin coffee? Well, probably, but go with me here.

The news about coffee may be a game-changer. This may finally engage people in the quest to slow climate change. Those who ignore the threat of catastrophic weather events and the danger of coastal cities being overtaken by the seas will react to the threat of bad, expensive coffee.

I know this: In post-apocalyptic books, coffee is always one of the most valuable items on Earth. Now we learn that global warming, not global war, could cause the coffee crisis.

Save our coffee, even if it means we need to rip that aerosol can of Right Guard out of my dad's hands as he tries to warm up my hometown by five degrees.

Hah, hah, hah.

Future generations of coffee drinkers will thank us.

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@hotmail.com.