For most football fans this is a disappointment. While the Super Bowl teams have the two greatest offensive players in the NFL (Kansas City's Patrick Mahomes and Philadelphia's Saquon Barkley), most of us were rooting for these teams to lose before the Super Bowl.
However, here we are. Whether you're a big fan or someone who will watch today's game for the commercials and food, I am here to serve you with information to help you navigate the 50% of the time that involves an actual game. Presumably, you want to cheer for someone, so here are 10 reasons to root for (or against) each team.
Philadelphia Eagles
1. Eagles fans are passionate. They sing "Fly Eagles Fly" after touchdowns and victories. They hate the Dallas Cowboys even more than 49ers fans. Eagles fans wear their passion proudly.
2. Barkley is the NFL's most exciting running back, a guy the New York Giants allowed to leave last year. He signed with their rivals and led the NFL in rushing yards.
3. Although they are often mocked, the Eagles remain one of the greatest bands in music history. "Hotel California." "Take it Easy." "Desperado." "Lyin' Eyes." "New Kid in Town."
4. The Chiefs are the luckiest team in the world. Want proof? There will be at least one play today where they get a surprising call from the refs or the Eagles make an inexplicable mistake. A team shouldn't keep winning that way.
5. Mahomes is overexposed. He's on too many commercials, as is his coach, Andy Reid.
6. Kansas City isn't even in Kansas, it's in Missouri, which is dumb.
7. Chiefs fans do that terrible tomahawk chop chant. Whether or not you think it's racist, it's absolutely irritating.
8. Taylor Swift goes to games because her boyfriend is on the Chiefs and the TV people keep showing her in the luxury suite. Who cares?
9. The Chiefs won the past two Super Bowls and three of the past five. They've won enough.
10. If you're a Raiders fan, the Chiefs are your biggest rival. If you're a 49ers fan, the Chiefs beat you twice in the Super Bowl. This is a rare moment where 49ers and Raiders fans can agree.
Kansas City Chiefs
1. Mahomes is the NFL's version of Steph Curry, an incredible playmaker who is a joy to watch. He'll do at least one thing today that you've never seen.
2. While the Chiefs are going for their third straight Super Bowl title and fourth in six years, this franchise had only one title in its first 59 years – yet the fans stayed loyal.
3. Chiefs football is the biggest thing in the western Missouri-Kansas region and beyond. Second place is probably eating big steaks, but it's not close.
4. Eagles fans once famously booed Santa Claus. And they're proud of it! Eagles fans are psychos.
5. The Eagles may have had a lot of famous songs ("Hotel California." "Take it Easy." "Desperado." "Lyin' Eyes." "New Kid in Town."), but they lacked an edge and are the perfect example of the soft-rock 1970s.
6. Philadelphia makes a big deal about the Liberty Bell, the cracked symbol of American independence. In reality, it's a broken bell that's about three feet wide. It's just a little bell!
7. Andy Reid coached in Philadelphia for 14 years and never won a Super Bowl. But now, along with Mahomes, he's winning. Blame Philadelphia.
8. Eagles fans are so obnoxious it's impossible to ignore them. Being an Eagles fan ranks No. 1 on the list of how every fan of the Eagles self-identifies.
9. Carrot Top is an Eagles fan.
10. Taylor Swift is a Chiefs fan! How could you root for anyone else, girl?
Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@outlook.com.
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