Lessons of three partially true cliches for graduates (and others)

Editor's note: Following is Brad Stanhope's prepared graduation speech, which he has maintained and updated every year since the late 1980s, yet never delivered.

Hello graduates and congratulations on making it through the toughest few years since World War II. You endured distance learning, wearing masks and a reasonable concern that every cough was the start of COVID. You are experiencing our nation's deepest division since the Civil War. Plus you've had to act like you understand cryptocurrency.

Now graduation, which is filled with advice. Today, I'm presenting three things you'll hear and why they're true and why they're false.

Find something you love to do and you'll never work a day in your life.

Oh, sure. Passion is important, so don't settle for a job if the only benefit is money. (Unless, of course, you really need the money.)

However, doing something you love might be something like watching Netflix all night or getting high all the time. If pursue those, you might never work a day in your life, but you'll also not have any income or happiness.

The truth: Follow what you love, but also learn to love new things. You'll probably change jobs multiple times in your life.

By the way, whoever said, "find something you love to do and you'll never work a day in your life," must never have had a real job. In any job, there are days that feel like work. That's called being human.

It's not the destination, it's the journey.

Oh, sure. If you're too focused on the goal (making a million dollars, playing professional sports, becoming a famous musician, becoming an assistant manager at a fast-food restaurant, earning enough to move out), you can miss the memorable parts along the way. As John Lennon (who died 20-plus years before you were born) said, "life is what happens while you're making other plans," so be sure to enjoy your journey.

The truth: The destination is important. That's what determines the journey, right? (By the way, it's OK to change your destination, which is why our phone GPS allows us to put in new destinations all the time).

By the way, whoever said, "it's not the destination, it's the journey," clearly never drove down I-5 to Disneyland or across Nevada and Utah on I-80. Those journeys suck.

You'll always regret what you didn't do rather than what you did.

Oh, sure. Many of us wish we would have taken that job offer or asked that person on a date or tried out for that part or for that team. We wish we would have moved to a different town or learned that new skill or joined that club.

The truth: We tend to compartmentalize this and forget the wise decisions to skip things – staying home from that party that ended disastrously; turning down a job that would have been a catastrophe; asking out that person who ended up as a serial killer (OK, maybe extreme). Sometimes, it's wise to not take action.

By the way, whoever said, "you'll always regret what you didn't do rather than what you did" never talked to someone in prison.

Here's some solid, reasonable advice: Follow your passion (within reason). Enjoy the journey (but also remember the destination). Take risks (but not all of them, particularly the kind that you'll regret forever).

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@outlook.com.