Making a spectacle: When I fell down and literally hit the 'ooof'

The most distinctive thing was not the rarity or that it hadn't happened in decades.

The most distinctive thing wasn't the public setting or the embarrassment.

The most distinctive thing was the sound.

"Ooof."

I was walking a couple of weeks ago from the parking lot toward my local grocery store. My mind was presumably wandering – my workday was over and I was picking up some food to bring home to Mrs. Brad. Who knows what else I was thinking: about the weather, my workday, the Giants, Paul Anka songs. Who knows?

All of a sudden I was on my hands and knees, sprawled on the sidewalk. I had tripped over the curb and fell down in public for the first time in decades.

What?

I checked to ensure I was OK. Then I looked around to see if I'd made a spectacle. Then I realized the sound I'd made.

I heard myself proclaim "ooof!" as I fell, as if I were a cartoon character.

Ooof.

I immediately jumped up. Only one person seemed to notice – an older man who asked if I was OK.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I told him. "I don't know what happened."

I checked my wrists. Fine. My hands were slightly skinned and my knees were sore, but I was good.

Then I wondered if he heard me say "ooof."

We fall down a lot as kids. At least I did.

Skinned knees were common. As a youngster, I consistently picked gravel out of my hands and occasionally banged my elbows. Perhaps I was a clumsy child, but there was rarely a three-month period in the years before I turned 10 during which I didn't fall down.

I fell down at school. I fell down on the street. I fell down in my yard or while playing sports.

It stopped as an adult. I have fallen a few times, but generally while playing sports. I got knocked down a few other times, or stumbled and caught myself – but it was usually when something unusual happened.

Not this time.

I was walking through a parking lot. The sidewalk was marked. I'd entered the store many times before. I wasn't shuffling my feet.

I was going into the store to buy two or three items at the end of a workday and suddenly I was on the ground.

Having loudly said, "ooof!" Who says that?

The next day, my right knee was skinned, but my hands weren't sore and my wrists were fine. I had no injuries from my mishap, other than my pride.

It was a reminder of my clumsy childhood. One moment, you're walking along, enjoying a fine day. The next moment, you're splayed on the ground, embarrassed and afraid that you're hurt.

You've said "ooof." Someone asked if you're OK. You get up and insist things are OK before you start walking and confirm that you're indeed OK.

The bad news: I fell down in public.

The good news: As far as I can tell, no one noticed.

The likely news: Some people went home that day, telling their friends and family about the guy who fell down at the grocery store and shouted "ooof."

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@outlook.com.