Another inspiring, undelivered graduation speech

The text of Brad Stanhope's once-again undelivered graduation speech to whatever Solano County school would invite him:

Thank you for that long standing ovation and congratulations to the Class of 2018 at (insert school here)!

Graduation is both the end of a long journey and the beginning of a longer journey. But let's treasure the moment. Let's enjoy the present.

It's called "the present" because it's a gift. And because the phrase "the present" means now. Both of those are true, but the second is more true.

Anyhoo, congratulations on finishing high school. Remember, if this is the extent of your education, you have done something that 84 percent of Americans couldn't do. At least those were the statistics in 1890, which was 128 years ago. It's probably different now.

For those of you who are advancing to college – whether it's community college, a four-year school or the electoral college – you are about to advance to a memorable part of your life consisting of toga parties, beer pong and wild escapades, if the movies I've seen are any indication. My memory of college is of working and doing homework, but apparently I was an exception.

Here's some advice from someone well down the road from you: Enjoy college. Learn. Make friends. Avoid making life-changing mistakes. Collect stories. Try to graduate. Realize college is spring training for the rest of your life.

Here's the part about being 18 that you might not appreciate now: You will look back on this period for the rest of your life. At least until you lose your memory.

Anyway, as today's commencement speaker, I have some tips to prepare you for adulthood.

First, work: Remember the guy who said, "Do something you love and you'll never work a day in your life"?

That guy never had a real job.

Even if you land your dream job straight out of high school (aside from LeBron James and Taylor Swift, few of us do), there will be difficult days. There will be tasks you don't enjoy. There will be difficult co-workers. There will be dumb bosses.

Work anyway. Do a good job anyway. The best way to succeed is to do a good job, require little maintenance and outperform expectations. That's true in your teens, 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s and beyond.

Remember, your job at 20 or 30 is unlikely to be your job at 40 or 50. That's called a career: In the 21st century, our jobs change, but our character in them remains.

Most who find joy in work know that it's work. You don't go to play, you go to work (unless, of course, you're in theater. Then your work may be a play. But I digress.).

Now, about love: Sometime in the next decade or two, you will likely fall in love. Enjoy that. But don't assume it's easy.

Like with everything else great in life (good health, wealth, good career), relationships blossom for people disciplined enough to do the hard work. In a relationship, that means learning to communicate difficult things, finding common interests, always being teammates.

Remember that. The other person – if you marry them – is your teammate. So be a good teammate. Be their biggest fan. Work on the team. Stick together. It's worth it.

There are other tips: Exercise. Eat well. Make some crazy decisions. Take some risks. Have fun.

You're going into the world. Spring training is over. The regular season begins.

Reach Brad Stanhope at bradstanhope@hotmail.com.