Sports rules: Why you can't have a 'second team'

In sports, there is no such thing as a "second team."

The need for this clarification became obvious when I saw my niece post on Facebook last week that the Dallas Cowboys were her "second team," behind the Oakland Raiders.

It's disturbing enough that a family member is a Raiders fan. The "second team" concept? It's heresy.

Allow me to explain.

There are certain rules that come with being a serious sports fan. For instance (and I previously covered this topic), there are three acceptable reasons to cheer for a team: You live (or have lived) in their geographic region; a parent or important adult in your childhood was a fan of said team; or there is an unusual connection between you and the team (you're a Dodgers fan because of Jackie Robinson, someone from your hometown played for the Milwaukee Bucks, a member of the Cleveland Indians once saved your life).

That's it. Otherwise, you're wrong. (Yes, I'm saying you are wrong to be a Lakers fan or Cowboys fan if you were raised in Solano County and have no other connection. You're a front-runner, not a real fan.)

The "second-team" rule is equally obvious: If you are a fan of a professional sports team, they're your only team. There is no second team. There is one.

There are acceptable pseudo second-team instances. For instance, that the San Francisco Giants are your favorite team and "whoever is playing the Dodgers" is your second team, is fine.

Also acceptable is to have a team that you adopt for a specific season after your team is eliminated – as long as you only jump on the bandwagon for one postseason, then return to your beloved team the next year.

My niece's admission – that she somehow had a "second team" behind the Raiders – was shattering. It was like hearing your spouse had a long-term affair, but still considered you their first choice.

A second team?

Are you kidding me?

Perhaps this is a natural outcome of society's softness. In an era when we want to give everyone a participation trophy, maybe people pick a second team so they won't feel so bad when their team is eliminated. Maybe we should extend that and have a third, fourth and fifth team. Maybe we should say we don't care who wins in sports, because we like all teams.

Maybe we should just shut down competition, because we've gotten so soft that it doesn't make any difference!

Yes, I used an exclamation mark and italics to emphasize my outrage at that last sentence.

It matters. Having favorite sports teams means that you celebrate when they win, suffer when they lose. Having a "second team" is a betrayal of your favorite team and anathema to everything sacred in being a sports fan.

Rule 1 in sports: There are three acceptable reasons for picking your favorite team.

Rule 2 in sports: There is no "second team."

Rule 3 in sports: Don't argue with the first two rules and call yourself a real fan.

Rule 4 in sports: I reserve the right to change my opinion for people I like, including my misguided niece.

But as Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young sang in their classic song, "Teach Your Children": You, living on the road, must have a code that you can live by.

Part of the code is no second teams.

Brad Stanhope is a former Daily Republic editor. Reach him at bradstanhope@hotmail.com.